Queen Bee in Chief: The Adolescent Drama of Trumpworld

We're all extras in a Mean Girls movie starring Donald Trump

In high school I longed to be a mean girl, so when a friend invited me to a party thrown by more popular girls, I happily accepted. I wore my coolest clothes and curled my eyelashes, anticipating a future where I too could look down on others.

I quickly learned the right look was not enough to curry favor with this crowd. My loyalty was instantly tested as was my willingness to demean and hurt others. Sadly, I could pass their tests, but acting this way left me empty. I made unnecessary excuses and left early.

Decades later, the memory of this experience still makes me flinch. I’d been seduced by the power and exclusivity of mean girl hierarchies, but I was disgusted by their pettiness and cruelty. For young females, this is an almost inescapable obstacle of adolescence. For adults, particularly those with wealth and education, it should hold no appeal.

But for some it apparently does. If you view the West Wing as a school cafeteria, and Executive Orders as a Burn Book, you get something eerily close to the drama and dysfunction of adolescent girl cliques.

Photo by Mathias Arlund on Unsplash

A Cast of Characters

The dynamics of this storyline has been explored in dozens of movies including Heathers, The Devil Wears Prada, Clueless, Bridesmaids, and the eponymous Mean Girls. It’s become common enough to merit brand status, with an established narrative, iconic imagery, and its own terms and taglines. Using that framework, it’s easy to interpret the current real world version playing at the White House.

Trump stars as the “Queen Bee,” the unquestioned center of all authority and activity. He demands fealty, rewards public adoration, and banishes anyone who dares contradict him. His power rests on dominance and theatrics. As a result, he is simultaneously adored and feared by even his closest companions.

His immediate circle of doting confidants and co-conspirators varies, depending on who is best able to make him feel revered. Musk fits the stereotypical boyfriend role, accompanying Trump to dinners and balls then roaming the halls flexing his muscle. Steven Miller acts as the blindly dedicated attack dog, rabidly gnashing at anyone perceived as a threat to the Queen. Kristi Noem and Pam Bondi compete to see whose hair and clothes can attract the most attention. And Laura Loomer cycles in and out, happily inventing conspiracies and throwing others under the bus in her constant quest for inclusion.

None of these folks seem particularly competent at their day jobs, but they all excel at exalting Trump.

The crowd of anointed “insiders” are surrounded by “wannabes,” mostly composed of media personalities vying to have the most access, the keenest insights, the most special relationship with the Queen. They are well-paid to feed off Trump gossip and share it with their audience, making their connection to the throne their lifeline.

Standing awkwardly at the edge of this social spectacle is an ever-growing list of “traitors” including Pence, Barr, Bolton, Cheney, Kinzinger, and Hutchinson, all ostracized and discarded as though they never had Trump’s approval. And of course, there are the “libs,” meaning everyone who doesn’t recognize the Queen’s inalienable right to ignore the Constitution and rule without dissent.

The Rituals

If I was just assigning roles, you’d be right to criticize me for being one-sided or unfair. But the behaviors follow suit and prove the absurdity of pretending this is normal.

Those in the clique have no independent values or standards—all beliefs are dictated by Trump. Loyalty tests are commonplace. Fail to sing the President’s praises and you’ll lose your seat at the table. Outshine him in a comparison and you become “a very unpleasant person.” Displease him and you won’t just be dropped; you’ll be shamed, name-called, and likely sued.

All of this is legitimized by the Queen’s repeated cries of false victimhood that double as grandiosity: I’m the most prosecuted. I’m the most maligned. I’ve sacrificed everything for you.

Regrettably, many targets of this mean girl gang shrivel in response. Columbia begged for forgiveness and promised to give Trump their lunch money forever. The A+ students, clustered at high-priced law firms, defended their profits instead of their values, congratulating themselves on still being smart. Even tech companies, the uber nerds who invented billion-dollar algorithms, suddenly couldn’t calculate the moral implications of bending the knee to someone driven by fury rather than logic.

At this point the only adults on hand appear to be the courts, Harvard University, and a handful of governors and senators. Each has bravely stood up to Trump, holding their ground and refuting his power. They’ve all been immediately punished either by losing funding or being attacked by Trump’s underlings.

The underling’s most potent weapon is lying, particularly when the wannabes will happily broadcast it to the base as truth. This week continued the stream of false claims highlighted by the assertion that Kilmar Abrego Garcia was a human trafficker (without a shred of evidence), that Harvard sanctions antisemitism (when they’re actually wrestling with complex free speech issues), and that tariffs are working as planned (while your retirement account begs to differ).

Built Not To Last

Even though they seem invincible, mean girl empires are built on sand. When the foundation starts to shift, the hierarchy collapses.

Many tactics can initiate this fall. Like any teen queen, Trump’s hold depends on being the center of attention. If he fails to command obedience through intimidation, if his master plans prove more performative than substantive, if his insincerity becomes even more obvious, or if we all just tire of the daily theatrics, his power will wane.

A more dramatic ending can come from the proverbial “snake in the grass,” a trusted minion who secretly covets center stage and is slowly and carefully edging into it. Nicky Haley proved too pliable for anyone’s tastes. Vivek Ramaswamy transferred out of the district. Rubio, shrinking further into couch pillows at each press conference, thinks he’s a contender but no one else agrees.

Maybe JD? If I were Trump I wouldn’t let him spend too much time with Don Jr. and Eric. That combination has Oedipus Rex (son kills father) vibes all over it.

This post is an obvious parody and as a break in the stress and chaos, I hope it’s entertained you at least briefly. But the ridiculous spectacle of politics playing out like a popularity contest driven by cruelty and flattery is profoundly sad. It’s a distraction from governing. It’s a hollow example of leadership, and it’s an erosion of democracy. At a time when the country needs wisdom and strategic planning, when a true conservative could have lasting and positive impact, we get emotional outbursts and vengeful tactics.

This series needs to end soon and I hope I never have to watch the reruns.

Your Turn

I’ve tried to be balanced and even-tempered over the past 6 months, and most of the time I think I’ve succeeded. But this week’s news cycle was too much to bear. I felt like I was watching a beloved home demolished brick by brick. You can say Trump will prevail in the end and actually make America great again, but at what cost? These questions are for those of you who still think he’s fit to lead:

1. Trump has betrayed staff, allies, and even his own vice president. He’s subverted the Constitution in order to deport people without due process, and he seems to be ignoring a Supreme Court ruling. What do you believe will keep you and those you love safe if laws are not enforceable?

2. Trump and his administration have repeatedly lied to the American people. Do you tolerate this behavior in your pastor, your boss, or your child? If not, why is it acceptable for a president and his staff?

3. What has Trump done to earn your loyalty—not past promises or largely unenforceable Executive Orders, but actual outcomes that have improved your life or your community?

4. Is there anything he could do that would make you say: “That crossed the line”?
   

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